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Important John Danowski Update

First of all, the most interesting man in lacrosse is back on Twitter. Second, he had an adventure today.


First, the good news:

This had slipped through the cracks a little bit. Danowski is the best college coach on the Twitter machine. It's not even close. Sure, I like other coaches on the Twitter machine (Gerry Byrne is a close second behind Danowski in the coaches-tweeting-things index), but I love Dino's updates. To wit:

This is fantastic, and today's dispatch from the Duke head coach confirms that fact:

This got me thinking: What would Danowski look like driving into work with the top down and the sun shining while listening to Tom Petty? Danowski didn't tweet a picture of his commute -- probably for the best, as that's dangerous and I don't want him to take a hospital-ordered break from Twitter while they repair his neck after getting into an accident while tweeting -- but College Crosse's graphics department put together a rendering of what it may have looked like:


Some brief notes on this:

  • I agree that Danowski likely drives a convertible with flames painted on the sides. He seems like that kind of guy. It's encoded in a Long Islander's DNA to put flames on vehicles, including convertibles and motorized coolers.
  • It seems somewhat dangerous to drive a car that has two asymmetrical and non-circular wheels. It also seems dangerous that the wheels do not appear attached to the vehicle in any way.
  • Danowski is wearing a standard-issue blue Duke long sleeve shirt (his hands are apparently covered in blue paint as well) and pirate hat. Yaaar!
  • It does not appear safe to drive at these speeds -- do you see the speed lines?! -- while not looking at the road, instead turning sideways to wave to the side of the road. This is especially tragic, as the road looks woefully uneven.
  • Eat your heart out, Bob Ross, with respect to that happy little tree.

Great things lie ahead, you guys.