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Virginia's Nike "Stealth" Lacrosse Uniforms are Clearly Visible

At least they aren't fashioned after a flag.

Geoff Burke-US PRESSWIRE

Maryland wore Under Armour's "Black Ops" uniforms last week for their meeting with Loyola, duds that appeared to be useful if you were to travel to space and pick out some fancy moon rocks. This week, Virginia is putting on Nike's "Stealth" uniforms for their date with Syracuse in Carrier Dome tonight. I am convinced that in two weeks some apparel manufacturer is just going to throw their hands up and put a team in fatigues and call it a day.

Here's the Cavaliers' kits for tonight:

You know what's "stealth"? Bombers, especially the ones that target things in a green hue and drop bombs down the chimneys of American enemies. Nobody sees or hears a Stealth Bomber coming, which makes it stealthy and deadly and awesome. Contrastingly, I can clearly see Virginia's uniforms, especially the parts that are day-glow orange. Day-glow orange is not stealthy. I am sure of that and I have never served a combat mission in my entire life.