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PEW! PEW! PEW! PEW! PEW! PEW! Watch your asses! There are laser beams of concentrated fun littering the universe!
Those guys shooting at your stupid faces to make them more fun? It's these guys:
| RANK | TEAM | FUN FACTOR | OPPONENT | RANK | TEAM | FUN FACTOR | OPPONENT | |
| 3. | Colgate | 5.6558 | Duke | 9. | Virginia | 4.5201 | Notre Dame | |
| 4. | Loyola | 5.1313 | Denver | 12. | Johns Hopkins | 4.3701 | Maryland | |
| 5. | Denver | 5.1157 | Loyola | 14. | Duke | 4.2381 | Colgate | |
| 8. | Maryland | 4.6243 | Johns Hopkins | 23. | Notre Dame | 3.3421 | Virginia |
Alert the authorities that deal with laser beams of concentrated fun! (Do such authorities exist yet? This is the future, right?)
The games this weekend are going to be all sorts of fun, and not just because you "paid an arm and a leg for the damn tickets." What's great about the back-to-back days of doubleheaders is that the slates are fairly even with Saturday looking slightly more fun than Sunday. These are the good times, people.
| AWAY | HOME | TIME (E.T.) | FUN FACTOR | RANK |
| MAY 19 GAMES | ||||
| Maryland | Johns Hopkins | 12:00 | 4.4972 | 3 |
| Denver | Loyola | 2:30 | 5.1235 | 1 |
| MAY 20 GAMES | ||||
| Virginia | Notre Dame | 12:00 | 4.2957 | 4 |
| Colgate | Duke | 2:30 | 4.9470 | 2 |
That's what the computing machine spit out, but now I'm concerned about you. No, you don't need to call your mother; rather, what game is looking like so much fun that it'll make you puke? The comments are yours.