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SyracuseFanTV: Albany 15, Syracuse 3

SYRACUSE IS LOST, BLUD

Below are highlights from SyracuseFanTV after today’s 15-3 loss against Albany. Viewer discretion may be advised. If you do not get the source material for this, please direct your attention to the greatest YouTube page in history.

ROBBIE: SyracuseFanTV, tough one today for the Orange DT.

DT: Look, I’ve spent the whole offseason about Desko. We’ve clearly made our bed and I’m not going to argue that for the next couple weeks. And credit to Albany, they’ve got some real good lads and they’re gonna contend for a title. But Robbie, the energy is gone from the Dome. Just gone. 3 goals in a top 10 game? There’s just no energy and it’s tearing me apart inside. We look lost, the crowd is sitting on their hands, our boys can’t move the ball into the box without turning the ball over.. it’s just a sad situation. I don’t know if he can do it, but Desko needs to go out there and change everything he’s doing. It’s clear this team has no confidence in themselves with what he’s doing and we’re gonna be in the bloody 5th place game if we can’t fix things up.

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ROBBIE: Troopz, a poor showing from the Orange today against Albany

TROOPZ: I told you this would happen, blud. Absolutely told you it would. This team was feeling all happy about themselves after killing Binghamton, yeah? Everybody coming on thinking hey this team’s going somewhere, yeah? Well with Desko on board there was no other way this game was gonna go, blud. Albany’s doing circles around us in crooting fam and now they’re doing the same on the field fam. Okay we’re f***ing doomed, blud. Can’t control Upstate New York anymore fam. We’ve got Army, you see they beat Rutgers, yeah? Then UVA.. you understand? F***ing doomed, you understand? Can’t do a damn thing on offense without giving up possession and making f***ing Albany look like the Bill Tierney Princeton Tigers fam. D looked good but then fell apart there after halftime, you understand? All on Desko. ALL ON DESKO blud. Completely out of touch fam.

ROBBIE: Well on the bright side Hopkins lost big to Loyola today and Cornell with a loss to Colgate.

TROOPZ: [/shrugs] Great, fam. We’re going 2-12 if Desko coaches them like this, you understand? Who cares about St. Cornellington Day anymore if we can’t make Final Fours, you understand? And Albany proved they’re MILES ahead of us, blud. Fire bludcot Desko. Only way we’re getting to greatness.

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ROBBIE: Ty and Claude, your thoughts after that one?

CLAUDE: Poor effort out of our lads, but you gotta credit Albany. If we had a coach like Marr we’d be dominating like ten years ago. He’s really got them going. But it just goes to show you how the Danes are way ahead of us now and that’s just unacceptable. We’re Syracuse lacrosse. We shouldn’t be handing over Upstate New York to them on a silver platter. But look, the big problem is we’re just too inconsistent. Last game we looked great on offense, today? Nothing. First half we shut them down, then just leaked goal after goal in the 2nd. I don’t have the faith in Desko that I used to to get it done, but hopefully this is the worst this season gets. I doubt it, but hopefully it’s the worst it gets. [/starts putting his hands over his face]

TY: Absolutely it’s the worst it’s gonna get. We’re gonna get back up beat Army and win out and get Albany in the NCAA’s.

CLAUDE: No no no what makes you think we’re going to beat an Army team that went out there and beat a top 10 team themselves today?

TY: Too big temperature difference.

CLAUDE: What?

TY: Too big temperature difference. Cold outside warm in the Dome. Couldn’t adjust.

CLAUDE: What the f*** are you talking about?

TY: We’re gonna beat Army it’s gonna be warmer next week we’ve got this we’re all good. Desko’s done this before he’ll do it again.

CLAUDE: BUT THE GAME IS PASSING BY DESKO

TY: Nah, not at all. He’s got this. Look at Hopkins and Cornell and UNC and Rutgers today. We’re winning out Albany the only tough team really on our schedule. I’ll give Duke a win too but we’ve got this.

CLAUDE: WHY CAN’T YOU EVER UNDERSTAND THAT EVERYBODY’S CAUGHT UP TO US? WE HAVEN’T WON A TITLE IN 8 YEA..

TY: We’ve got this!

[3 minutes of arguing without completing sentences ensues]

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ROBBIE: That does it for today, let’s see if our lads can get back at it next week against Army. Should be a good one! Subscribe and use promocode “CuseFanTV” on *generic British sports betting site that probably sponsors some horse racing, a darts tournament, and a League One club’s shirt* to get £10 in free bets!