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Every Division I tournament. Every team. College Crosse has it all on lockdown. Please send cookies and naptime. Today we're slashing to bits the Patriot League Tournament.
For my money -- Fort Knox-backed, honorable American currency that is currently valued at "Spare Pogo-Stick Parts" in international monetary circles -- there has been no league more fun to watch this year than the Patriot League. It had almost everything you could ask for: Action! Intrigue! The retail sale of pens with naked ladies on them when you tip the writing utensil from one side to the other! (That last one may be a lie.) In short, the Patriot League filled the vacuum that THUNDERDOME! left open with Massachusetts choosing to step on everyone's neck this season.
Fancy infographics and detailed team profiles will follow, but for now, here's an overview of the 2012 Patriot League Tournament that you can study non-stop until your eyes bleed. Everything gets moving with League America starting on April 27, 2012.
CONFERENCE TOURNAMENT: PATRIOT LEAGUE
Four teams will head up to bucolic Hamilton, New York -- Is that the right description? Should I have used "impossibly remote" or "where?" instead? -- for the 2012 Patriot League Tournament. Colgate is the playoff's host and one-seed, with Lehigh, Army, and Bucknell falling in behind the Raiders. It's hard to say there's necessarily a favorite in this year's tournament mostly because chaos favors nobody other than itself. Of course, an automatic invitation to the NCAA Tournament is on the line this weekend, but the three games will also help determine which teams will move toward May with legitimate shots at at-large bids to the show of all shows.
Here's how each team stacks up in some legacy metrics:
| SEED | TEAM | PACE | RANK | AOE | RANK | ADE | RANK | AEM | RANK |
| 1. | Colgate | 73.04 | 7 | 35.30 | 10 | 26.12 | 16 | 9.19 | 11 |
| 2. | Lehigh | 60.57 | 53 | 31.74 | 21 | 21.52 | 3 | 10.22 | 5 |
| 3. | Army | 68.53 | 16 | 30.49 | 27 | 25.60 | 12 | 4.89 | 17 |
| 4. | Bucknell | 65.74 | 30 | 34.55 | 12 | 25.60 | 11 | 8.96 | 12 |
AOE = Adjusted offensive efficiency (goals for per 100 offensive possessions).
ADE = Adjusted defensive efficiency (goals against per 100 defensive possessions).
AEM = Adjusted efficiency margin (AOE less ADE).
That's so much competitive balance that it'll make you puke. ("But I don't want to puke!" "Shut up. I'll let you know what's good for you and what isn't, peasant.")
Here's the shakedown on the big offensive weapons taking the field this weekend:
| TEAM | NAME | T.O.V. | RANK | TEAM | NAME | T.O.V. | RANK | ||
| Army | G. Thul | 8.77 | 56 | Bucknell | B. Eisenreich | 12.80 | 6 | ||
| Army | J. Glesener | 7.01 | 116 | Bucknell | T. Heritage | 8.53 | 63 | ||
| Army | C. Hayes | 5.26 | 185 | Bucknell | C. Bailey | 7.72 | 84 | ||
| Army | D. Lynch | 5.26 | 185 | Bucknell | D. Dickson | 7.72 | 84 | ||
| Bucknell | P. Burke | 6.30 | 137 | ||||||
| Colgate | P. Baum | 13.59 | 3 | Bucknell | N. Gantsoudes | 5.69 | 171 | ||
| Colgate | R. Walsh | 9.19 | 47 | ||||||
| Colgate | J. Ledwick | 6.99 | 117 | Lehigh | D. DiMaria | 8.21 | 69 | ||
| Colgate | B. McCann | 4.60 | 198 | Lehigh | D. Fantoni | 7.30 | 102 |
T.O.V. = Total Offensive Value (individual points per 100 offensive possessions). This is updated through all games played by April 22, 2012.
Rank = National T.O.V. rank. This is updated through all games played by April 22, 2012.
So, that's your overview. Who are you taking to take home top honors on Sunday?