John Danowski is Excited About Wearing Ugly Pants

USA TODAY Sports

The Duke head coach hit the links for nine crazy holes.

John Danowski: Father, philosopher, wearer of ugly pants:

Now, Danowski didn't tweet a picture of his scorecard. As he is not a dictatorial leader of an Asian country that is best described as "The Democratic Nation of Crazypants Psycho Town," it is probably safe to assume that Danowski did not shoot nine consecutive holes-in-one while murdering tyrannical Americans with just lightning bolts shot from his fingertips. College Crosse, however, has obtained Danowski's scorecard and reprints it below:

HOLE 1: 8! Note to self: Beets are icky!
HOLE 2: 15-ish! Made my caddy take a lap because he was looking at me funny!
HOLE 3: J!
HOLE 4: 6?! L!I!E! L!I!E!
HOLE 5: !!!!!!
HOLE 6: 27! Accidentally hit my ball into a house! Now that's a tough lie!
HOLE 7: [Illegible. Looks like he was trying to diagram a flux capacitor.]
HOLE 8: 10, just like Eli! No golf interceptions, though!
HOLE 9: 7(teen)!

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Please choose a new SB Nation username and password

As part of the new SB Nation launch, prior users will need to choose a permanent username, along with a new password.

Your username will be used to login to SB Nation going forward.

I already have a Vox Media account!

Verify Vox Media account

Please login to your Vox Media account. This account will be linked to your previously existing Eater account.

Please choose a new SB Nation username and password

As part of the new SB Nation launch, prior MT authors will need to choose a new username and password.

Your username will be used to login to SB Nation going forward.

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join College Crosse

You must be a member of College Crosse to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at College Crosse. You should read them.

Join College Crosse

You must be a member of College Crosse to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at College Crosse. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9341_tracker