Lacrosse Base Blue Jay Almost Ready

In case you haven't heard (and given the fact that it's summer time and your primary concern is whether there's enough ice in the cooler to chill a metric ton of frosty beverages, the answer is probably "no"), Johns Hopkins is just about ready to unleash The Cordish Lacrosse Center on the world. This is exciting news for college lacrosse, what with a university dedicating lots of hard American currency to a facility that will house athletic programs that other schools reference as, "We still have one of those teams? Neat!"

Some of the initial images of the facility are pretty sharp. I doubt that this signals some kind of immediate facilities arm race in college lacrosse -- at least not until Michigan starts building its Lacrosse Base Wolverine, which is probably going to shatter faces with its features -- but Hopkins has kind of reset the bar for high-end program support. When complete, the facility is going to be aces:

  • Fancy locker rooms and coaching offices for both the men's and women's programs. The locker rooms, I assume, are not shared. Although, if Johns Hopkins truly considers itself a leader in the field of human sciences, they'll make this happen because captive breeding is an important scientific pursuit.
  • A field-level patio area featuring exhibits that chronicle the history of Johns Hopkins lacrosse. I am to assume that there will be sufficient mythical space to house all of Hopkins' claimed mythical national championships.
  • A 50-person theatre. I assume that the theatre won't be used to show Hopkins' 2009-2012 Final Four runs because, well, there's no such thing as a theatre that shows imaginary things.
  • A training facility, a conference room, and an academic center.
  • All kinds of environmentally sustainable building features because Earth kicks ass.

I still would have preferred Hopkins to try and establish and build a moon base so that its games could be called "The Slowest Game In Pseudo-Gravity While Needlessly Pumping One's Legs Aloft Like A Cartoon Character That Has Just Run Off A Cliff," but beggars can't be choosers.

You're officially on notice, Syracuse, Princeton, Virginia, Duke, et al.: Johns Hopkins has re-taken "Daddy" status, if only in terms of brick and mortar.

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